


The Daily Lives of the 10th Vongola

by PantherHearts



Category: Katekyou Hitman Reborn!
Genre: Bananas, Mukulas, TYL Generation, Texting
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-25
Updated: 2015-10-25
Packaged: 2018-04-28 00:47:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,275
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5071462
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PantherHearts/pseuds/PantherHearts
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>"I like bananas."</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Redemption

"I like bananas," Tsuna declared as the Guardians settled down for breakfast. The table, which extended from one end of the breakfast hall to the other, was crowded despite its length.

"Bananas?" Gokudera looked up from where he was slicing bacon with a knife and feeding the bits to Uri under the table, "Tenth, there're bananas over there if you want them." He pointed to a basket on the far left end of the table.

"Oh, not plain bananas," Tsuna said absentmindedly as he made swirling patterns on his pancakes, "I like them made a specific way."

"I see," Gokudera said, looking thoughtful, as everyone else tucked this bit of information into the recesses of their brilliant minds, for later use.

After breakfast, Hibari disappeared from everyone's human radar and went off to do who-knows-what. Tsuna had assigned him a mission, but considering the fact that it was a non-killing-related mission he doubted that Hibari would finish it as quickly as the maiming ones. That, however, didn't mean that the raven haired ex-prefect wouldn't do it with less efficiency, but it was obvious that it was a lot lower in his list of priorities.

Hibari had probably gone back to Namimori for his monthly visit, because the ex-prefect always spared time to revisit his beloved hometown.

A kick on the head from Reborn was the signal to Tsuna that he had a lot (a lot) of paperwork to do. "Ay, ay, yes I know," Tsuna said, wincing as he rubbed his head. He stood up, pushing his chair back and wrapping a pancake in a napkin. "Don't destroy anything, alright?" he said sternly to the current occupants of the table, not noticing that Mukuro had mysteriously vanished.

"Hurry up, Tsuna," Reborn ordered, walking lazily in front of the said boss, "I calculated that it'll take at least twelve hours to finish today's paperwork.

"You calculated?" Tsuna glared at the hitman accusingly, "It's more like you threatened someone to calculate for you… not that you aren't able to do so yourself!" he added hastily, dodging the green mallet that came swinging his way.

Tsuna entered his study, squeaked and tried to make a tactical retreat out of the double doors. He tripped over the Arcobaleno's green staff and stumbled, landing on a heap outside the room.

Looking anywhere but the hitman, Tsuna said firmly, "I'm not going in there."

"Then it's coming to you." Seconds later, the Decimo found himself, locked out of his study and surrounded by stacks of paper in the hall, a fountain pen in his hand.

From inside the study, Reborn smirked, before he saw something out of the corner of his eyes. "Oh? So No-Good Tsuna has a deluxe coffee maker that he didn't tell me about?" The hitman made his way over to the machine and noted the bag of expensive coffee beans beside the machine.

Reborn picked up the packet, tore it open, and started the coffee machine. "Oh, look, it's the new model that hasn't even been released on market yet…" His smirk turned cold. "I'm going to have to tor—ask him about why he hadn't told me about it later."

Outside, Tsuna sneezed.

 

The maids were cleaning up the breakfast table as Uri slunk around Gokudera's legs, purring for more bacon. (When she received none, she dug her claws into said legs and stalked away, hissing, as Gokudera clutched his leg in pain.)

Ignoring the pain in his calf, Gokudera sent his meanest glare at everyone still at the table and snarled, "Did you hear that? Tenth said not to destroy anything!"

"Ha, relax, Hayato! We won't," Yamamoto said, busy packaging the toast and eggs that he'd salvaged as the maids began to clear away everything.

Gokudera snorted inelegantly. "Has there ever been a day where nobody destroyed anything?"

"Yeah, yesterday we didn't break any walls," Lambo said indignantly, tearing open the wrapper of a lollipop. "You can check the records, Stupidera."

"Or ROOMS," Ryohei added helpfully, looking up from where he'd been re-bandaging his hands.

"Idiots! We're not talking about large-scale things like an ENTIRE WING OF THE MANSION!" Gokudera roared, a tick mark beginning to form on his forehead. "How about the cabinet that was split in two?! All the china sets in there shattered!"

"Aha, that would be me," Yamamoto said sheepishly.

"Oh, so the painting that was utterly ripped apart in the same hall was you too?!" Gokudera accused, slamming a hand down on the table.

"No, that was Hibari," Yamamoto said nonchalantly, "We were sparring!"

Gokudera took several deep breaths to calm himself before saying, "Why on EARTH do none of you bother to spar in the training room?"

"We have a training room?" everyone chorused in surprise.

 

Tsuna groaned as another pen snapped, sending ink splattering all over the document. "Ruined, ruined, ruined," he muttered, crumpling the paper and throwing it over his shoulder. "I thought these fountain pens are supposed to be high-quality?!"

"They are," Reborn said from the other (right) side of the door, drinking his seventh cup of coffee, "You just enjoy burning them up."

"I am not burning them up!" Tsuna retorted.

"Look at your hand," Reborn's calm voice sounded muffled from inside the room.

Tsuna looked down and nearly yelped in surprise when his hand was indeed on fire and melting the pen ever so slowly.

"How you manage to miss a flaming hand but notice a cleverly hidden camera in a wall, I'll never know," Reborn said, opening the door a crack to throw Tsuna a new pen. It bounced off the brunette's head and rolled somewhere behind him.

"Hidden cameras are pretty rare," Tsuna defended, "But I see flaming hands a lot!"

"That would be a good point," Reborn conceded, "If it wasn't your hands that were flaming."

"It's exactly my hands that are flaming!" Tsuna shouted, sounding exasperated.

"Exactly."

"I don't see how this argument is in your favor at all!"

"Everything is in my favor, No-Good Tsuna."

Tsuna had to agree with that.

 

"Whoa, this place is so cool!" Yamamoto said in awe, as he glanced around the spacious training area.

Gokudera slammed his head into a nearby wall. "You've lived here for three years," he said in a strained voice, "And you've never noticed the training room?"

"Nope," Yamamoto said cheerfully, "I've never been in this side of the mansion before!"

"THERE ARE EXTREME REINFORCED PUNCHING BAGS!" Ryohei roared, dashing over to his section of the training area to examine them in glee.

"That side's probably mine, right Hayato?" Yamamoto said, heading over to the space with lots of obstacles and disposable materials. "Ha, look! There's even a machine that shoots stuff for me!"

Gokudera watched in alarm as Yamamoto turned it on and perfectly rounded stones began shooting out at rapid-fire speed.

"GAH!" Gokudera yelped and dropped to the ground as the machine began to swivel around.

"Hey, this is fun!" Yamamoto said, walking behind the machine. "I'll shoot, and you guys have to dodge, okay?"

"THAT'S NOT HOW IT WORKS!" Gokudera was close to tearing out his silver hair in frustration. "YOU'RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE ONE DEFLECTING THE ROCKS, BASEBALL IDIOT!"

"Ohh, I see now," Yamamoto said, turning off the machine (much to the relief of the silver-haired bomber), "It's kind of like the exercise that Dino-san made me do the first time we had to practice, right?"

"The… the first time?" Gokudera asked, his mind going blank for a moment.

"Uh, yeah, before we had to fight Mukuro, remember?" Yamamoto said, taking his spot in front of the machine and readying his sword.

"Oh?" Gokudera racked his brain and finally found the correct memory. It almost brought him to tears—almost. The right hand man of the most feared boss didn't cry! "That was such a long time ago. Idiot."

"Ah, but that was how this started, wasn't it?"

A resounding bang and clatter from a side of the room distracted them for a second.

"AHA!" Ryohei whooped, holding up his fists in a defensive boxing stance, "ONE DOWN! …Uh, three hundred more to go?" He glanced uncertainly at the admittedly monstrous pile of reinforced punching bags.

The only section of the training area that seemed even remotely used was Hibari's, but the ex-prefect preferred to do his training exercise on living targets and not on unmoving obstacles.

"I'd recommend that you stay away from that section of the room," Gokudera said gruffly to everyone else present. "It's Mukuro and Chrome's." He pointed to the upper left corner.

"I don't think they've used it," Yamamoto said, looking at the seemingly bare area of the room inquisitively.

"They're Mist users, moron," Gokudera snapped, "You never know."

"Kufufufufu~"

"YARGH!" Gokudera leapt away from the spot where he was standing with a manly yelp (that he was rather proud of). "BASTARD!"

"My, wasn't that fun?" the pineapple hair styled illusionist faded into view, "And I was really hoping for someone to fall for my little trap, too…" The area around the previously-bare corner wavered and dissipated, and Gokudera nearly fainted. (That, he was not so proud of.)

The corner had a tastefully arranged rope trap and a cage full of red-eyes tarantulas that were definitely not normal, since they sported pineapple-like hair styles on the top of their heads as well.

In other words, they were monstrosities in more ways than one.

"What an acute representation of your inner personality, Rokudo Mukuro," Gokudera said dryly, before turning and hightailing it out of the training area as fast as possible when the illusionist's eyes narrowed. He ignored Yamamoto's shouts as he sprinted towards the elegant archway when—

"Chrome, my dear?" Mukuro called, and Gokudera almost made it out the door before a rope trap fell on him from a concealed spot above said door.

"I tried to warn you," Yamamoto called, as Gokudera was dragged, kicking and bellowing threats, toward the cage of Mukulas*, as Mukuro had affectionately dubbed them.

(Gokudera would later find out that the pineapple hair styles hurt.)

 

An hour before lunch, all the the Guardians except Hibari had abandoned the newly-discovered training area in favor of finding the way back to the correct dining hall.

"Is it this way?" Lambo wondered, peering down a hallway lined with rooms.

"Those are the servants' quarters, stupid cow," Gokudera scowled. "Have none of you walked around the place yet?!"

"Nope," all of them chorused sheepishly.

"I just know where to eat, sleep, and go to meetings," Yamamoto admitted, looking embarrassed.

"Is that why you always spar in the halls and destroy everything?!" Gokudera howled, looking incensed. "It gives the Tenth a lot of trouble, you know?!"

"Ah, but it won't happen anymore," Yamamoto pointed out.

"We've found the extreme training room!" Ryohei shouted. "A hundred a three down, a hundred and ninety-eight more to go!"

"Why did they give you three hundred and one punching bags, anyway?" Gokudera muttered under his breath.

"Ah, cheer up, Hayato," Yamamoto said, grinning, "It's almost lunch!"

"Yeah, I guess," Gokudera grumbled, and the party made it down the hall in relative silence.

That is, until Hibari entered the scene.

"You," he snarled, getting into a defensive position as he glared at Mukuro. Gokudera sweat-dropped—did they still hold such a deep grudge against each other after ten years?! (As if he was one to talk.)

"Kufufufu~ You can't beat me this time," the deadly pineapple chuckled ominously as Chrome scooted off to the side. She might have gotten quite a bit stronger over the years, but she wasn't on the same level as Mukuro.

"I plan to stay in the lead," Hibari replied coldly, as Gokudera ran their scores through his head. If Hibari had won thirteen times since he last counted and Mukuro had won twelve, that meant the current score was; Hibari: 129, and Mukuro: 128.

Gokudera needed to break this fight up. "The Tenth told us not to destroy anything during breakfast!"

"He did?" Hibari shrugged as he turned so his back faced the hot-tempered bomber, "I wasn't there."

"I wasn't there either," Mukuro laughed his… unique laugh.

"I thought you were at breakfast?" Gokudera said suspiciously.

"Ah, I just wasn't there for Tsunayoshi-kun's announcement," Mukuro said easily, and then the two clashed in a flurry of sparks and burning glares.

 

"What." That was Tsuna's cold answer once the non-fighting Guardians raced down the halls to warn their boss of the situation.

"I'm sorry, Tenth! I couldn't stop them!" Gokudera apologized, bowing.

"It's okay, Gokudera," Tsuna sighed, pushing back paperwork and checking his hand yet again to see if it wasn't flaming, then rubbing his temples. "You would only have gotten hurt if you tried to stop them, anyway. I'm glad you didn't try," he added kindly, "Because then there'd be three hurt people in the infirmary today."

The Guardians shivered at the sudden waves of violence and anger coming off their normally calm boss.

"Where are they?" Tsuna stood up and brushed off his pajamas (he hadn't bothered to change into a suit since there wouldn't be any visitors today).

"Here, Tenth!" Gokudera led the way down the hall and they'd almost reached that particular unfortunate hall when Tsuna came to a halt and pushed all of his Guardians back, just as the wall exploded. Roll, Hibari's box animal, came piercing through the entire wall and it crumbled, sending up dust and ending up in a pile of debris on the plush carpet.

The sounds of metal clanging against metal could be heard from beyond the hedgehog, but even the sound of their two strongest Guardians fighting wasn't as terrifying as the Tsuna his Guardians saw now.

Gokudera almost wanted to speak up, but he feared for his life.

There was a shadow covering Tsuna's face and nobody wanted to break the tense silence. Gokudera almost felt sorry for the two Guardians about to be on the receiving end of the Tenth's anger, but (to his eternal shame) it was actually kind of hard.

Tsuna stalked past Roll and, putting a hand on the hedgehog's side, shrunk it back down to normal size, where it remained nestled in the Decimo's hands.

"What. Do you think you're DOING?" Tsuna asked coldly, setting Roll down on the floor and crossed his arms, silently demanding an answer.

It was the most fear-inducing experience of everyone's lives.

 

Once Tsuna had worn the two down, beat some sense into them, and then hung them by their collars on the castle battalions (metaphorically of course, because Tsuna wouldn't resort to violence to solve a problem) everyone was thoroughly humbled, even the ones that were just spectators.

The worst part, however, was when Tsuna walked away and disappeared during lunch. When they asked the maids, the young lady in question informed that the Young Master had requested for his lunch to be brought to his room.

The Guardians looked at each other (Hibari leaned against a nearby wall and closed his eyes) and immediately felt guilty.

"I think we should make it up to Tsuna," Yamamoto volunteered.

"Tsuna-nii hates us now," Lambo sniffled, sounding distraught, and for once Gokudera felt like he had something in common with the teenager.

"What should we do for Bossu?" Chrome asked softly, and everyone put their minds to it.

"Hey! Didn't Tsuna say that he liked bananas during breakfast?" Ryohei suddenly said.

"Bananas?" Gokudera raised an eyebrow. "But he said that he liked them made a specific way."

"Really?" Yamamoto looked excited. "Then let's give Tsuna banana desserts!"

"Everyone split up and make a list of how bananas can be made!" Gokudera barked, and all the Guardians disbanded to their own rooms.

 

An hour after lunch, Yamamoto said, through the communication devices everyone was wearing, "I'm going to give Tsuna a banana milkshake, okay?"

"Milkshake? Okay," Gokudera agreed, and they all stopped whatever they were doing to listen to the outcomes of Yamamoto's gift.

"Oh, hi, Yamamoto," they heard Tsuna say faintly through the device, "What brings you here now?"

"Here, Tsuna, would you like a banana milkshake?" Yamamoto offered.

"Huh? Okay, thanks, I needed something to drink anyway."

Once the Shigure Soen Ryu expert exited the Decimo's study, he muttered into the device, "It was average. I don't think it's the right one."

They were all very disappointed.

"Okay! My turn then!" Ryohei volunteered, and they all swore they could hear the fist pump. "Banana bread!"

 

They made sure to space out the 'gift-givings' so that Tsuna wouldn't have so much food to eat all at once.

After Ryohei's banana bread, they tried grilled bananas, banana cheese cake, bananas in milk, banana cookies, banana muffins, banana and spinach salad, banana smoothie, banana cream pie, banana milk, banana ice cream, banana chocolate, banana pancakes, banana skewers, frozen banana hot chocolate, banana bundt cakes, banana turnovers, banana granola bars, banana Hors d'oeuvres, and even banana shrimp basmati rice salad.

By the seventh time, Tsuna seemed to have caught on to what they were doing, and he was immensely amused. He confided in Reborn about his Guardians' sudden generosity and they shared a rare laugh together. That, however, ended up with Reborn eating half of his banana-themed impromptu snacks (because Tsuna would get fat otherwise).

"Don't you think we seem kind of suspicious?" Lambo whispered to Gokudera as they crept down the hall, holding a banana pudding.

Gokudera snorted. "Ya think?" he whispered fiercely. "But Tenth's favor is more important now!"

Lambo was doubtful. "If you ask me, he seems more entertained than angry right now…" But Gokudera ignored the Lightning Guardian's words and the continued down the hall.

To all of their immeasurable relief, Tsuna ate with them at the table during dinner. However, for fear of reawakening their boss' anger, everyone stayed silent.

After three minutes of nervous silence (Reborn was smirking the whole time, that sadist), Tsuna finally gave in and said, "I'm not mad at you anymore, you know."

There was a collective, drawn-out sigh of ease, and the atmosphere around the table relaxed significantly.

"Say, Gokudera, Yamamoto, and all of you," Tsuna began, looking curious. "What were you trying to do just now, anyway?"

"You mentioned you liked bananas during breakfast, Tenth," Gokudera explained, "So we thought it'd be a good idea to try and, uh," he looked nervous, "Make you less angry by giving you bananas?" It ended as a question.

Tsuna began to chuckle, and it soon turned into uproarious laughter. He wiped his eyes and took a deep breath to calm his laughter.

"All that effort, you thought up banana shrimp salad for goodness' sakes, and you forgot about banana sundaes?"

There was a collective sound of hacking as everyone choked on their own food.


	2. Texting

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "I look away for one second."

"I look away for one second," Tsuna said in frustration as he thumped a pillow against the couch, "And they're all on their phones. Every single one of them!" he complained to Reborn, who, as usual, was way too amused for Tsuna's liking. "Stop smirking like that!" the boss growled, throwing a pillow at the hitman.

Reborn batted it away without so much as a blink (the pillow actually exploded afterwards, creating a fluffy mess on the floor) and replied, "Well, maybe you should check what they're doing."

"I know what they're doing!" the boss banged his head on his expensive desk, groaning in exasperation. "They're texting. It's pretty obvious! Though I never knew that a person's thumbs could move that fast."

"Oh?" Reborn raised an eyebrow. "You text too, you know." He lifted his cup of coffee and took a leisurely sip.

"That's not the point," Tsuna mumbled from where his head was smushed into the desk. "I know they're texting, but I don't know who they're texting."

"You sound like a stalker," Reborn said matter-of-factly. "I know you're their boss, Tsuna, but you really don't need to know who they're texting."

Tsuna turned a faint red at that. "It came out wrong," he quickly said, "What I mean is—they're texting each other!" he explained, annoyed. "Right in front of me, too!"

Now this was interesting. "How do you know?" Reborn inquired, leaning forward the tiniest bit.

"Well, it's pretty obvious when their thumbs or index fingers or whatever way they like to text move, and then they'd stop and someone else would begin typing and they'd stop. It kind of goes on like that!"

Reborn had to admit, he was impressed. "Not many people notice that, you know, Tsuna," he said in an offhanded way.

Tsuna gave him an odd look. "People don't notice when other people are texting?"

"Not when the other person's doing so under a table."

 

The meeting was…horrific.

It had been the monthly meeting of Tsuna's Family, and every time he looked away they'd be on their phones.

Tsuna was growing tired of this. He babbled on slightly about nothing much in particular as Reborn observed in a corner, and the fedora-wearing Arcobaleno noted that, true to Tsuna's word, everyone was clearly texting each other.

They'd occasionally glance up at Tsuna and smile at the talking boss, and one of them would abandon their phone and take some notes (they took turns doing that).

Otherwise, they were all clutching their phones tightly under the table.

Tsuna raised his eyebrow slightly and caught the eye of Reborn, who was lurking in a corner. His eyes said, I'm going to change the topic.

Because Reborn could read minds—or eyes, at least. There were very few people whose eyes he couldn't read, but a select few (very) skilled individuals could shy away from Reborn's seemingly telepathic powers.

Much to Reborn's pride—even if he'd never admit it—Tsuna had learned to fully mask his emotions around potential enemies, but around family he was ridiculously easy to read.

Tsuna began to talk about Enma and his guardians, and to Reborn's amusement, none of Tsuna's own Guardians noticed.

Feeling a bit more brave, Tsuna slowly changed the topic to ("…Enma's hair is red, isn't it? Just like strawberries—ah, I really want a strawberry smoothie right now, perhaps I'll ask the cooks for one after this?") strawberries and not a single person noticed.

(Gokudera would later look at his notes and wonder why he'd unconsciously written a whole page of bullet point notes about the importance of smoothies.)

By the time the meeting ended and all Tsuna's Guardians had trailed out of the room with cheerful goodbyes, the desperation in the Decimo's eyes was clear as the Vongola Mansion's well-kept windows.

"See, Reborn?" the brunette smacked his head against his spot at the head of the table. "It's hopeless. My friends are addicted."

"Are they in a group chat, then?"

"Nope. I've checked all my chats, but none of them have any long conversations." Tsuna felt hurt at this realization. "Reborn! They're leaving me out!" he whined, something he hadn't done in years.

"Maybe they're planning something," the hitman suggested.

"Without me?" Tsuna looked even more hurt.

"Maybe they're planning an event."

"Er…" Tsuna mentally checked things off the list. "It's not Christmas… It's not anyone's birthday… It's not Chinese New Year… It's not Easter, or Valentines, or Saint Patrick's Day, though why they'd waste three weeks planning a St. Patrick's Day event is beyond me. Reborn! There's nothing to celebrate!"

"You can always take the last resort," Reborn lowered his fedora to hide his eyes, "Hack into their accounts."

"But that's invading their privacy!" Tsuna protested.

"Humph. You're too nice," Reborn sniffed, "I'll do it instead."

 

The next day, Tsuna watched in horror as his only confidant in this issue whipped out his sleek black phone and began texting at the speed of light.

"Reborn!" he wailed, "Not you too!"

The hitman took a sip of his coffee.

"Everyone's leaving me out," Tsuna said to his personal butler, Pietro, who looked uncomfortable.

"Maybe they're doing something for you, Master?" his butler offered, pouring the Decimo his requested shot of whisky.

Tsuna gulped it down and groaned. "It's been a month, Pietro!"

"Give it some time," Pietro said wisely. "Should I investigate the matter for you, Master?"

"Thank you, Pietro!" Tsuna said gratefully.

"In fact," the butler informed him, refilling the brunette's glass, "One of the Masters has an appointment with the staff today. Do you want me to check what they're doing?"

"Even better!" Tsuna brightened up.

The next day, there were four bottles of strong whisky on his desk and no Pietro.

"NO! NOT YOU TOO, PIETRO!" Tsuna howled, slumping back in his chair. "I'm doomed," he muttered, putting his face in his hands. "I'm all alone… I'm done for!"

 

At four in the morning, Tsuna's phone buzzed and he nearly jumped out of his bed in shock. (He had been awake, gloomily pondering what he'd done to make life hate him so, and being quite the drama king.)

It was a text from an unknown number.

12-15-15-11/6-15-18/15-18-1-14-7-5!

It was a very simple code, and its only use really was to slow down the reader. However, being very well practiced in the simple code due to Reborn's influence, Tsuna read the message in no time and frowned. Maybe it was a trap?

He shrugged, jumped out of bed, and looked for orange. The first thing he saw was Nuts, who was prowling around the bed and purring at him.

"Good morning, Nuts," Tsuna said affectionately, scooping the box-animal-turned-daily-house-pet and scratching him behind the ears. To his surprise, Nuts leaped out of his arms, turned to shoot him a knowing glance, and slunk out of the room.

Ah, he did have that text to follow, didn't he?

Feeling slightly suspicious now, Tsuna followed Nuts out of the room.

There were orange roses on one of the cabinets. Feeling very much like a Disney princess, Tsuna glanced down the hall and saw an orange frame on one of the pictures.

He followed the orange objects throughout his portion of the mansion and finally arrived at a wall, which was painted entirely orange.

"Eh? Where am I supposed to go now?" Tsuna wondered out loud, just as his phone buzzed again.

23-8-1-20/1-18-5/25-15-21/23-1-9-20-9-14-7/6-15-18? 2-18-5-1-11/20-8-18-15-21-7-8!

Break through? Tsuna was slightly confused. Was this an emergency text message from one of his Guardians…? But what kind of enemy imprisoned their target in the target's own home?

Well… it wouldn't hurt to destroy something once in a while. Tsuna found himself feeling kind of satisfied and he blew the wall into smithereens, even if he felt guilty afterwards.

The newly-destroyed wall crumbled down to reveal the new orange air bike that the Vongola mechanics had finished the previous day. "Do I get on…?" Tsuna asked aloud, and he was immensely creeped out when his phone buzzed.

Of course you do! Idiot.

He noticed that the person had abandoned the number code. Tsuna stumbled a few times on typos before replying with,

Tsuna: Are you stalking me?!

The Decimo thought he heard a few grunts and muffled giggles, which meant they had to be nearby. That was rather strange—his hyper intuition hadn't acted up yet. Were they dangerous or not?

GET ON THE BIKE.

Tsuna didn't know whether to run away screaming or get onto the decidedly ominous looking bike.

Two broken tables, five screaming maids, and one terrified Tsuna later, the bike zoomed out of the halls and into the lush green garden.

The Decimo let out an unmanly shriek (really, he was behaving more childish in this one day than he did in the past year) as the bike brushed past the brick wall.

A strange splashing sound could be heard from around the corner and Tsuna paled. What was that…?

The bike rounded the corner, skidded, and Tsuna was suddenly a hundred meters away from a thundering orange waterfall.

"HOLY MOTHER OF SWEET BABY LIONS WHAT IS THAT?!" Tsuna screamed, frantically wondering how the construction of a waterfall in his backyard had escaped his attention. Not just that, but who had managed to dye an entire waterfall of water orange?!

The bike was steadily getting closer and closer to the wall of orange and Tsuna was ready to leap off the bike, regardless of possible broken bones.

"YAAAAAARGH!" And he was doused from head to toe in orange water, and shivering violently in the cool breeze.

This was getting ridiculous!

The stranger sent him a text again.

On the scale of one to ten, how fun was that?

Tsuna, who was now certain that the sender of the message was in close enough range to hear him, shrieked, "NOT FUN! IT WAS NOT FUN!"

Aw.

There was a distant sound of snickering as Tsuna glowered. He sighed. "I wonder who's doing this? I have work, you know…work!" Tsuna quickly swiveled the bike around and started back towards the mansion. "Reborn's going to kill me!"

Parking the bike in the spacious garage, he swung his leg over and took one step off onto the safe ground—which turned out to be not so safe after all.

"Eh?!" Tsuna shrieked as his foot met nothing and he found himself plummeting through nothingness. He fumbled for his gloves and was about to enter Hyper Dying Will Mode and get the heck out of this hellish world when he landed on a very soft, bouncy mattress.

He nearly sprained his neck bouncing off the mattress, but he managed to land on both feet on the ground.

It was dark in this cavern. Tsuna closed his eyes for a second and visualized where he'd be—if he'd fallen down through the garage, directly above him would be the training area and meeting rooms.

How troublesome.

Tsuna was about to burn his way to the surface when a light flickered.

One by one, a string of multicolored lights lit up on a far wall, and Tsuna watched as they formed the words, 'HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TSUNA!'

It was his birthday?

Suddenly, the sound of multiple things cracking could be heard all around him and Tsuna watched in a kind of dazed amazement as multicolored glow sticks came to life. The lights that came on overhead illuminated the mass of people crowded against the walls of the massive cavern, and Tsuna noticed that all his Guardians, tutors, friends, and servants were in the very same room.

Together, they chorused in a deafening shout, "HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TSUNA!"

The Decimo responded in the best way he knew how. "Eh?!"

"I told you," Reborn said simply as everyone relaxed and dissolved into happy chatter, "They were planning something."

"Eh?" Tsuna repeated, subconsciously feeling glad that he wasn't all alone and done for as he'd previously thought.

"Stupid Tsuna," Reborn reprimanded sternly, whacking Tsuna on the head with a nearby staff (where had that come from?). "Forgetting your own birthday, really."

"Tenth! Happy birthday!" Gokudera shouted, running up with a pleased expression. "Do you like it?" he asked eagerly.

"Eh?" Tsuna said intelligently.

"This!" the silver-haired bomber gestured at his surroundings.

"Ah, yes!" Tsuna said, recovering from his temporarily lack of vocabulary, "I like it very much," he assured his right-hand man.

"Haha, sorry if we made you feel lonely," Yamamoto said, walking over with a cupcake in hand, "We needed to get the whole place dug out silently, see."

"You dug it out?!" the brunette exclaimed, feeling quite overwhelmed.

"Well, see, there wasn't anywhere that we could renovate without attracting your attention," Yamamoto shrugged and grinned, "So we dug out a new chamber!"

"Er, why did you need a new chamber anyways…?" Tsuna really couldn't wrap his head around the fact that they'd hollowed out an entire space just for his birthday.

"This place has a lot of cool functions!" Yamamoto said, brightening. "We'll show you them later on!"

"All your presents are over there, Tenth!" Gokudera pointed excitedly at a far side of the room.

Tsuna turned around to look and nearly fainted.

There was a long, long (very long) table stretching from one side to the other of the cavern, and there were presents piled everywhere on it. There were at least eighty on there.

That was enough to make Tsuna want to run out screaming, but what really scared him was all the presents that were overflowing everywhere. They were under the table, lodged in the uneven walls, hanging from the table, and even part of the table.

Tsuna would never find out how that worked, but he'd rather not know anyway.

"Gokudera, what's the net for?" Tsuna asked, deciding to ignore the issue for not and pointing up at the ceiling.

"You'll see," Gokudera said mysteriously.

Dino was there with his subordinates, and he cheerily greeted Tsuna and handed him an elegantly wrapped present. "There wasn't enough space on the table," he told Tsuna, ruffling his 'younger brother's' hair, "So I thought I'd directly give it to you instead!"

That sparked competition in Gokudera, and the hot-headed man disappeared in the crowd, presumably to dig through the pile of presents for his own.

Yowling from behind Tsuna alerted him that Natsu and Uri were having a (hopefully) playful cat-brawl. The Decimo sweat-dropped and edged away from the box animals. He couldn't remember letting Natsu out of the box—but the little cub was always roaming around freely so he supposed that it wasn't abnormal.

"Oi, trash."

The deep and menacing voice still sent shivers up Tsuna's spine and he turned around slowly. "Y-yes, Xanxus-san?"

"Get rid of your pets. They're disturbing Bester." Xanxus flicked a thumb at his pet liger, who was lounging in a corner and sending hungry gazes at the two fighting box animals.

"I'll try," Tsuna promised, and looked nervously around. "Xanxus-san?"

Xanxus replied with a grunt.

"Where are Squalo-san and the others?"

"Can you quit the '-san' thing? You've got to face the facts, trash. You're no longer a wimpy kid anymore. Wimpy, maybe," here Tsuna winced, "but kid, no."

Tsuna was still pretty reluctant. "Er, okay."

"And that long-haired trash is somewhere outside trying to control all the other useless brats." With that, the intimidating spiky-haired man strode off.

Tsuna was rather impressed. That must have been the longest sentence Xanxus had ever spoken to him that didn't include insulting Tsuna.

"Tsu-kun!" Nana hurried through the crowd with Iemitsu in tow, a bright smile on her face. "Happy birthday!"

"Thank you, Kaa-san," Tsuna said gratefully. "How was your flight?"

Nana hugged him briefly and said, "Oh, it was great! They serve very good lasagna on the plane, you know."

"I haven't seen you in months," Tsuna said regretfully.

"Oh, it's okay, Tsu-kun! I know you're busy," she looked knowingly at her son, "And Iemitsu's always at home now to keep me company!"

(Once he became boss, Tsuna had requested for Iemitsu to return to Namimori and spend time with Nana, to make up for all the years he'd missed.)

"How's my tuna-fish?" Iemitsu smiled at Tsuna from where he stood beside Nana.

"I'm doing fine," Tsuna answered politely, and then someone called for Iemitsu and his parents left before it got too awkward.

"Should I go find the Varia?" Tsuna mumbled out loud, which soon proved to be a mistake.

"Of course," Reborn said, appearing noiselessly at Tsuna's side. "A boss should always keep track of his subordinates."

"Well, in the past months I couldn't! You wouldn't let me!" Tsuna yelped in defense.

"Slacking off when I wasn't there, were you?" Reborn's eyes glinted, ignoring Tsuna's babbles about how Reborn 'always rigged up traps every time I tried to find my Guardians' and 'nearly killed me once with dirty blankets!'

The hitman shrugged. "Well, that's not my problem, is it?"

"Reborn! This is not fair."

"Remember what I said?" Reborn leaned close enough and whispered, "Everything is always in my favor."

(Tsuna would later find out that the leaning forward was only for effect. A room could be filled with squealing infants and everyone would still be able to hear Reborn's threatening whisper—if he intended for them to hear, that is. After all, what kind of hitman would he be if he couldn't whisper properly?)

 

Much to Tsuna's relief and delight, the next monthly meeting was included fully attentive Guardians and no secret texting under the table.

"U-um, I would like to thank all of you for planning a birthday celebration for me," Tsuna smiled at all of them with a shyness seldom seen nowadays.

"It's no problem, Sawada!" Ryohei boomed, looking satisfied. "An extreme party for our extreme boss is only fair, after all!"

"Ryohei's right, Tsuna! You don't need to thank us," Yamamoto added.

"Did Bossu enjoy the party?" Chrome asked from where she was seated next to Mukuro.

"Yeah, I loved it," Tsuna tried to convey his genuine happiness to them by means of his eyes, "And I finally found out what you were texting about, too!"

Oops. He hadn't meant to let that slip.

Gokuera immediately looked horrified. "Tenth! We didn't mean to make you feel bad!"

"A-ah, it turned out all right in the end," Tsuna assured his panicking Storm Guardian, "I'm okay!"

"Heh, we're sorry for keeping a secret from you, Tsuna!"

"Extreme apologies!"

Lambo piped up, "Tsuna-nii, did you like the fireproof fountain pen I gave you?"

The meeting room immediately descended into chaos as everyone tried to interrogate Tsuna about whether or not he liked their present.

Reborn left from his spot in the shadowy corner, and slipped out of the room undetected. He chuckled internally. Stupid Tsuna, he thought in one of his rare moments of affection, forgetting his own birthday.

**Author's Note:**

> *The Mukulas (Mukuro-tarantulas) may or may not make an appearance in later stories, ones that are part of this series that is.
> 
> Oh, and I had so much fun searching up all the banana desserts/food—I had no idea so many existed! Humans are so creative! If you're wondering, there're 22 foods up there. X)


End file.
